One of thing things I do to help with me this roller coaster homeschooling life of mine is I get the wonderful opportunity to go to a Charlotte Mason moms night meeting. They have been an answer to prayers to be over the years. I still applaud them then for not kicking me out when I came each month full of tears feeling like a failure. Oh- how I have grown!
they are now even greater and have allowed me to continue to grow by helping out with leading the group meetings sometimes. This time I team lead it with my amazing friend Amy :)
I know there were many of you - by the way I missed you! who did not make it so I thought I would send out my notes from the meeting. Also LOTS of links to the thinks we talked about.
Sooo here it goes...
Amy started off by sharing a lot on the Habit of Attention from the wonderful book Laying Down the Rails they also have a wonderful section on "Dawdling" that Amy encourages us to read as well. There is also some great insight in the Chapter called Inconsistent Kitty from Charlotte Mason Companion book, after we were all full of wonderful and inspiring quotes and sharing ideas,
I shared a few things.... These are my notes so they are not "fully what I said" but I did add here and there to make it a bit more complete.
More on the how we could develop these habits not only our Children but ourselves as well
The goal is to Teach Self Compelled Attention –
She (as in CM) wants us to teach the “child to will themselves to
attention” rather than just obeying forced attention.
One is lifelong, the other will be temporary, ending as soon
as the teacher is gone.
There is no education but self-education.
Self-Compelled.––As the child gets older,
he is taught to bring his own will to bear; to make himself attend in spite of
the most inviting suggestions from without. He should be taught to feel a
certain triumph in compelling himself to fix his thoughts. Let him know what
the real difficulty is, how it is the nature of his mind to be incessantly
thinking, but how the thoughts, if left to themselves, will always run off from
one thing to another, and that the struggle and the victory required of him is
to fix his thoughts upon the task in hand. (Vol.1, p.145)
How can we do
this?
-
Clearly understand what is excepted of them – in
a safe non “provoking way” this means that we need to make sure the child knows not only how to do the work, but what is expected as far as rules. For example my boys know that if they are focused they get a 5-10 minute break before heading on to the next lesson, etc. They know that is they waist the time, they do not get a break and will have to finish later, when they would other wise be getting free time, or free play.
- I am, I can, I ought, I will – making sure they "understand" also means for them to understand who they really are, going back to CM motto for children.
- They have to have a desire and know
they can- develop this habit of attention as well because the Lord want them too, (not us making them/teaching them)
- - Like a muscle,
the more he exercises his will to pay attention, the stronger it gets and the
more he will be able to pay attention.
- - Keep lessons
short
- - Genuinely praise
whatever effort you see them making towards developing their habit of
attention.
- - Go about this
little by little, day by day rather than expecting perfection the first day. It
takes time and practice just like anything else.
- Grace, patience
and encouragement are a great help.
Why so hard?
CM said Attention 'is in every child in full measure'. Then why do we see so
little of it in so many children? Mason claims that we hinder it. Some things
she says hinder attention are:
- the 'talky-talky teacher' who gets between the learning and the child - over lecturing
- lifeless books with no living thought in them & long lessons
- force and over correction
- not accepting what the child gives back (their work is never good
enough)
- not trusting the child's intellect
- over stimulation of from other “screen activities” or the idea we need to "always prepare activities and things" for schooling
What can we do?
Reduce Stress – relaxation book, I LOVE this book! Teaches about good stress and bad stress, it is soooo much easier to learn to pay attention when you are not stressed!
Adjusting
assignments, to the needs of the child.
Giving more attention to relationships with that child, rather then
assignments
Diet& Food- we are Gods greatest work in all that He has created
–
what we eat effects us, end of story.
Essential Oils – really help me. I like these two depending of if I need to "relax and focus" of if I need energy to focus Tranquility, or Awake
Games and Activities
to help train the brain to be able to develop the Habit of Attention
Trey of Items - Activity - we did this at the meeting I thought it was fun. (see picture bellow)
you place a number if different things on a trey, and let the kids look at, then take it away and see what they remember. If they are old enough have them write it down.
You can also take away a few things and they bring it back and see if they can tell what is missing.
you can do all things that are similar like cars, or very random items
you can leave a trey of times to be looked at through out the day, and see if they were paying attention, or place it out, and let a timer and them take it away, or cover it. Try it different ways.
-
Be a Spy
-
hide something small – lego guys or small
pictures through out the house and see if they can find them through out the
day- you can tell them to be on the look out, or better yet just see if they notices themselves through out the day
-
also service spies – be on the look out for
seeking ways to help others
Picture Study fun books – picture study is a great way to help develop this skill, a couple of our favorites are...
Spot the Differences Art Masterpiece books- we only have book 2 they are short but really fun.
This is not an "art book" but it is really fun, Look and find book, my kids LOVE it!
Games:
Othello- this game teaches all kinds of wonderful things for the brain!
Copy work – pick some quotes or scriptures on attention
Read Books Bible Stories – Noah; what if he had not
paid attention to Gods instructions? or Samuel? or others- relate that to us, and how we need to be prepared to pay attention to do the Lords work.
Jars Activity-
Jar of golden Habits - got a large Mason Jar, and also a container of yellow popping corn, and we had a lesson, where we read this Story called "One Scoop at a time" this story teaches us that as we obey the commandment over time each one is like a little kernel of light, but over time it added up to lots of light. My kids LOVED this, and after a couple months we filled the jar and then had pop corn as a fun activity. You could do this same thing, with the idea of Attention, it is a Golden Habit that shares light helping to develop other Habits.
Be the Example for them-
“At Scale How time was to be respected, given to the thing
or person claiming it rightfully. Then there would always be time,
without over-pressure or distraction. This sense of time value was hard
to achieve but it bore the test of experience during the two years'
training. What an effort of faith it all was...it did not seem possible
to find a moment for everything, yet if no time was wasted there was plenty of
it and no hurry. - Cholmondley, p. 150
Mason states "Do not bury yourself in the book while
the children are reading aloud. Give your full attention to the reading,
then when the time for narration comes receive what they tell you with your
whole mind. They will tell it all the better to someone who is listening
and who is not consulting a book." To this, Cholmondley adds,
"To carry out these two pieces of advice needed great power of attentive
reading beforehand and of attentive listening during the lesson."
-
Am I doing to much multitasking?
-
Am I really listening to them?
What kind of example am I setting for them?
I am the first to say I am still really learning!!!!
Ok- that evening some other things that came up were habit training charts,
Habit Charts and links
I do not know how to share a file on here so if you want to a copy of the Obedience Chart I use let me know (see Habit Training - on Obedience - yes I know I still need to add part 2 to to that!)
Here is a really bad pictures I just took with my iPad- you get the idea though- see the other post for details on it.
Here is a really bad pictures I just took with my iPad- you get the idea though- see the other post for details on it.
Amy shared THIS one that she likes
I made my own VERY simple version of the one above for what my kids need if you are interested let me know I will be happy to email you a copy. Again bad ipad picture of my version :) I will post more on how we use this in a later post but in short if they are "caught" doing good things by anyone else they get a check, and if it fills up they can pick a little prize from the treasure box but we talk about how these habits are worth more then treasure.
o Other things shared
Amy - shared this Blog she likes URtheMom - she said you can find lots of blog radio (I looked and could not find it though- so I will ask her- Amy if you read this can you tell us how to find the radio station you were telling us about?
Also people asked about Handwriting apps Amy's top pick was Wet dry App- I guess they have a free try it one- then you upgrade to the full-
My kids like this one, I think it is to flashy, & over stimulating but it works GREAT for my one child because you have to hold your fingers like you do a real pencil. Not just with your finger, I have tried it, and it knows, - this would be better for a little older kids because of that. It is called Crabby Writer
THANK you all!!! if you read through this- sorry for my bad spelling, typos etc. hope you found something that will uplift and inspire you on your journey!
THANK you all!!! if you read through this- sorry for my bad spelling, typos etc. hope you found something that will uplift and inspire you on your journey!
Thanks for posting this, Joann! I really appreciate your and Amy's preparation and leading the meeting. Great job!
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